Here comes truth number 1: “You can’t change other people, and it’s rude to try.“
Had a good laugh at this. When I was
younger very young, I used to think that if the person loves you a lot, then that person will change for you. Most of the time, I got disappointed. Then again, I was VERY YOUNG and very naive. It was only when I was older that I realized that you should never try to change a person. Accept them for who they are. If you can’t stand who they are, then don’t force yourself to be with that person.
On the other hand, if someone wants to change and they ask for your help, then be the help they need. Support them. But don’t force them.
These days I laugh when I hear about couples fighting coz of this issue. Most women would think that if a guy loves them, he will change for her (stop smoking, get another job, stop collecting basketball cards, and etc) not realizing that the guy is hoping that she will just accept him for who he is.
This doesn’t just apply to romantic relationships. It applies to the family as well–even to our circle of friends.